Haha, awesome update!
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Haha, awesome update!
Hip hip hooray!
Thanks guys. It was a beginning. And it wasn't "hollywood perfect" lovemaking. It never has been with the two of us. But at least we are back to a starting place to "figure it all out" all over again. This feels strangely like when we first got married, with neither of us being sexually experienced and trying to figure it all out.
I have to thank a couple of chemicals which, though they may have helped physically, the fact that they were present helped give me the mental confidence to go forward. I had acquired some tadalafil and took 40mg about 2 hours prior. I do have to say that this stuff only has a very weak effect on me. It helps a bit, but not a ton. But again, just knowing it was in my system and would help me was a big boost. Also, I have been dosing test significantly higher for the past 10 days which has been giving me spontaneous semi-hard erections. I took this as a major cue that I was physically to go for it.
Congrats, Burly! In my head, it ended like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVLyfVkMAKg
CONGRATS!!!!! I cant imagine the issues you guys have worked through. Ive been married 10 and WOW! to make it that long and still be together, especially in todays society... MUCH RESPECT and wish you two a happy journey going forward!
It hasn't been an easy road, that's for sure. Even in the beginning there were the usual marital issues, but sex was painful and therefore not desirable for her. As a 22 year old with a raging sex drive, this was no easy thing to deal with. Of course this led to a lot of resentment from me which I eventually had to work through. Fast forward 15 years and wife starts menopause which kicks in her sex drive. By then, I'm unable to carry out the act. Then she feels undesired by me. Go figure. Talk about your moments in bad timing. :mad: The only good thing about the turnabout in circumstances is that she finally understood what being sexually frustrated was all about and felt badly about denying me for the first 10+ years. This opened up some pretty awesome communication that we had never had before on this subject matter.
We've been married over 20 years now, and if it weren't for open communication at some critical times, we would likely be either another divorce statistic or we would be terribly miserable. We figured out how to stay married in a predominantly sexless marriage during that 20 years and figured out a way not to hate each other. I think we somehow both figured out that the other person was a pretty great person to be around and had most of the characteristics that we would choose in any mate. I believe that this kept us from looking outside of our marriage and choosing to be satisfied with 85 or 90%, rather than taking a gamble to get the other 10-15% elsewhere.
why was sex painful for her??
Genetics. Apparently the size difference between male and female ends is too great. I can't shrink, but with more practice she can stretch. Ran into the same problem again yesterday and took it real easy on her, stopped short and finished up with non penetrating activity.